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Monday
Mar122012

« 28. Low emotional intelligence: A loss of respect »

Written by Rachel Green. Director, The Emotional Intelligence Institute, accredited MSCEIT consultant.

Emotional intelligence and EQ occur on a continuum. One person may have high levels of emotional intelligence, another low levels.

Most of us, by definition, have average levels of emotional intelligence. However, our emotional intelligence can vary from one competency or dimension to another.

For example, in terms of emotional self-control, people differ in their skills and many problems may arise if you have limited skills in controlling your strong emotions at work.

I will list a few of them here and encourage you to add your own.

4 disadvantages of low-level emotional self-control at work.

  1. You may lose the respect of colleagues, partners, suppliers, clients, stakeholders, patients, employees, ratepayers - in fact, everyone who experiences your rage or outbursts.
  2. You may limit your career because you hijack meetings, are unable to build productive relationships with suppliers, clients, employees, or stakeholders, or are unable to speak in front of a group.
  3. You may say or do the wrong thing at the wrong time. For example, a client I was talking to told me he was furious one day at the way he and his colleagues were being treated by their executive team. He burst out in a loud voice and said to the deputy CEO, "You are a f...... managerial moron". "Unfortunately," my client continued, "the CEO and all his subordinates were in the room at the same time and the deputy CEO took the opportunity for revenge in my performance review".
  4. You may limit your career opportunities. You are more likely to be aggressive and bully or hurt other people. Promotion is less likely to be given to someone who can't control their strong emotions. When strong emotions are uncontrolled it is quite conceivable that claims related to bullying, harassment and stress leave will increase from the people who bear the brunt of them. This is a financial risk that many organisations do not wish to take.

Want to do the MSCEIT to measure your emotional intelligence? It is the gold-standard ability measure. To find out how to take the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso-Emotional-Intelligence-Test and gain feedback on the results from our Director, emotional intelligence specialist, Rachel Green, click here

Further resources on the Mayer Salovey emotional intelligence model.

3 disadvantages of low-level emotional self-control at work.

  1. You may alienate important people and find that they are off-side when you need their support.
  2. You may fail in executing your responsibilities if the strong emotion is something like severe anxiety. For example, you might be expected to give important presentations on behalf of your organisation. If you are struck with stage fright or a panic attack and unable to complete the task, the organisation looks bad, and so do you. I have met numerous people, at senior levels, whou suffer from significant levels of presentation anxiety and are unable to advance because of it. Fortunately there are techniques that can be used to control this strong emotion.
  3. In your attempts to feel better or bury your shame, you may get caught up in non-productive addictive behaviours, such as sex, alcohol, drugs, gambling, and the like. Research by leading emotional intelligence expert, John (Jack) Mayer, has found that people with higher levels of emotional intelligence are less likely to abuse drugs and alcohol.

How well do you control your strong emotions?

Have your emotional intelligence assessed now.

Want to know how high your emotional intelligence is? There is another model of emotional intelligence, by Salovey and Mayer, that has an ability-based emotional intelligence test called the MSCEIT which you can complete online.

Click here to find out how to take the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso-Emotional-Intelligence-Test (MSCEIT) and gain feedback on the results from our Director, emotional intelligence specialist, Rachel Green.

Develop your emotional intelligence now

We have many resources plus coaching packages to help you. Click here for the 5 star emotional intelligence coaching package, or for more details or to make a booking e-mail us now or pick up the phone and call us.

Develop your emotional intelligence now and lead a happier, more productive life and improve your work relationships, whether with colleagues, stakeholders or customers.